I am Pam. Pam Beasley.

I just finished off two large pieces of cake from two different yummy birthday cakes, all while chatting with Nicole and reading a hilarious email forward. Where am I? At work! Is this what it's like to work a desk job? What was I doing slaving all day on my feet, swallowing my lunch down during short lunch breaks, playing mediator between who hit who first, when I could've been celebrating co-workers' birthdays during the workday?

About a month ago, I got a full time job!!!...as a...receptionist! lol, exciting huh?


For those of you who are on Facebook, you may have noticed I posted a bunch of pictures. And I've updated this blog, complete with pictures and colors. This is due to the 7 hours I daily spend in front of the computer, with acess to tempermental internet. My job description: answer the phone, transfer calls, maintain the floor's kitchen and schedule appointments.


This may sound like a horribly boring job to many of you, but I LOVE it!


I actually spend a nice percentage of the day making social plans, emailing, gchatting, FBing, taking care of bridesmaid and maid of honor duties and chit chatting w my 2 coworkers. They're also female 20 somethings, so we have a lot in common. We share snacks, shop online, watch youtube and look for recipes.


Never mind that this receptionist job is a crazy pay cut from teaching, I'm getting office experience to put on my resume! And to think, this company went out on a limb to hire me too! Those employers that don't know much about academia have such little regard for educators and their abilities. Who knew that my teaching experience would be a hinderance to be a professional paper pusher! All I want is to be an assistant at a publishing company. (sigh) I guess all in God's timing.


However, it's quite refreshing to work somewhere where there isn't so much liability and responsibility. I carried such heavy burdens for my students and brought so much work home with me. Now as soon as 5:30 hits, I'm out!

I know someone that just moved here for the challenge of finding publishing work in nyc. She worked in publishing in San Francisco for a short while and upon arriving was quite agressive with her search, maybe even more than me. Like me, she hit the ground running, networking, going on a bunch of informational interviews, etc. But unlike me, she has publishing experience and the interviewers really liked her and told her they would love to hire her and would try to get her into the company. Well guess what...she didn't find work either!! If she can't, then how can I? Times are tough, man! I regularly read online about publishing company sales dipping, lay offs, declines, blah blah blah.


God's slowly changing my heart. My disappointment definitely isn't as heavy anymore and I'm feeling somewhat peaceful and content and hopeful. I've been studying James 1 with my small group and it's fitting. My 6 month anniversary just passed a few days ago and I am so grateful that I took that leap of faith to come here. I miss CA and family and friends so much, but God has blessed me here with a good church, nice friends, two great apartments and wonderful roommates.


There's something about this growing experience that I'm going through, living and trying to make it in nyc, being independent and relying on God to provide for me. I have no doubt that it was in God's plan for me to come out here. I wouldn't be growing if I were in CA. He's teaching me about trusting Him and that my constant worry and stress is a sign that I question His plan. He's also showing me what it means to completely surrender my life to HIm, something I don't want to do. Yes, I know God knows what's good for me and wants me to live a good and exciting life. Yes, I know that only the Truth in Him will bring eternal joy. But knowing and doing are very different. That one day when we meet, I hope that He will know me. Matt 7:21-23.